


I Don't Want to Be Alone

by felicityollies



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-08 01:55:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5478992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felicityollies/pseuds/felicityollies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>post s3 canon divergence - what happened with Thea and Laurel after Oliver and Felicity left on their road trip. Aka scenes we deserved to have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Don't Want to Be Alone

**Author's Note:**

> flarrow femslash week: day seven - milestones and/or smut/fluff. Okay so I’m taking some creative licence with this prompt. Not really a milestone (does first kiss and first i love you count?) and probably not as fluffy as it could be. Idk I just really wanted to write this.

It was the first night back at the loft. Her brother had taken off with his girlfriend. There was hardly a goodbye before they disappeared. To say that Thea was angry at him was an understatement. They had all been through a lot in the past couple of months, but she didn’t understand how he just up and left.

Thea let out a shaky breath as her eyes moved over her apartment. It was quiet, eerily so. She stood near the couch and looked to the place where her glass coffee table had once been. She remembered vividly what had happened there. The feeling of her small frame crashing into the glass. The dark soulless demonic eyes peering into hers as the sharp blade pierced her. Her insides on fire from the pain. The taste of coppery blood in her mouth. He left her there to die. Her body becoming cold until she drifted out of consciousness. 

These thoughts invaded her mind every time she was in this place alone. She had tried staying there after Oliver had left with the league. She avoided the living room, but even when she was up in her bed she felt uneasy. She had nightmares about nearly dying. She had nightmares about violence and bloodlust that she couldn’t explain. She had nightmares of Sara’s death. It made her stomach twist into knots. 

Thea didn’t know if she could do this anymore. The loft didn’t feel like home. She didn’t know if she had a home anymore. She’d lost herself long ago and now it felt like she was continuing to lose everything around her. Roy was gone, Oliver and Felicity were gone, and there were a number of people in her life that were dead; one because of her. Now she couldn’t relax in her own home. 

Her hand dipped into her pocket and grasped onto her phone. Without really thinking about it she pulled up Laurel’s name from her contact list. Biting down on her lip she waited for the older woman to answer. 

“Hi Thea.” She said in a soft sweet tone. 

“Hey.” “Are you okay?” 

“What makes you think something is wrong?” 

“I know you, Speedy,” Laurel let out a soft breath. “I know what you sound like when you’re upset.” 

“I don’t think I can stay here anymore… my apartment… I just can’t.” 

Laurel didn’t hesitate. “You can come here.” 

“Really?” 

“Mhmm. Pack some things and I’ll be there soon, okay?” 

“Thank you.” 

* * *

Thea curled up on the couch in Laurel’s living room, a cup of chamomile tea in her hands. The little ceramic mug had a cute bird on the side. It was definitely something Laurel had picked out.

“Thank you again.” She said softly. 

Laurel sat down next to her and nodded. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“It’s terrifying to be alone.” She whispered staring into her cup.

Laurel’s hand moved to rest against Thea’s shoulder. Her thumb caressed gently in a way that made Thea relax a little. 

“Every time I’m there I think about him.” She sighed gripping onto the mug tighter. “I know he’s dead, but…. I almost was too.” 

“It’s okay.” She whispered. 

“I don’t want to be alone.” Thea’s voice was so quiet it was almost inaudible. 

“You don’t have to be.” 

Thea slowly dragged her eyes up to meet Laurel’s. 

“Stay here. We can send someone to get your things. You don’t have to go back there until you’re ready. If you never go back that’s okay too.” 

Thea felt some of the weight lift off her chest. “Thank you so much.” Her lip quivered and a few tears spilled down her cheeks. 

Laurel wrapped her arms around Thea and held onto her tight. She whispered sweet and comforting things until Thea calmed. 

** The first few nights were terrifying for both Laurel and Thea. She had nightmares bad enough that she woke up screaming in a cold sweat. 

The first time it happened Laurel was out of bed and ready to fight before she realized what was happening. She rushed into Thea’s room and climbed into the bed. She gently woke the twenty-year-old with a shake of the shoulders and whispers of her name. 

“It’s okay.” She took Thea into her arms. 

Thea panting heavily wrapped her arms around Laurel’s middle. 

“It was just a dream.” Laurel smoothed back her hair. 

Each time she stayed with her until Thea had calmed down enough or she simply drifted back to sleep in her arms. Laurel was extremely worried about her, but she wasn’t sure what else to do. She hadn’t been in this type of situation before. All she knew was that she wanted to help Thea. She cared for her so much. How could she not? She’d known her practically since she was born. 

She rubbed Thea’s back and watched her as she slept again. She was such a tough young woman, but she looked so tiny and fragile like this in her arms. 

“It’s going to be okay.” She whispered more for herself than for Thea. 

* * *

It took a while for the nightmares to become less frequent. Even longer for them to almost completely stop. And it was well into the summer before Thea had her first real peaceful sleep. Talking about how she was feeling with Laurel and talking about the nightmares helped. She’d never been one to spill her feelings out to people, but Laurel listened. She didn’t judge and even better she made her feel normal.

“Have I said ‘thank you’ lately?” Thea asked as they both sat down for their weekly movie night. 

“Only every day.” Laurel held onto a bowl of popcorn. 

“Are you tired of hearing it?” 

“A little,” Laurel said truthfully. “You don’t have to thank me. The smile on your face is thanks enough.” 

“Cheesy.” Thea giggled. 

“True, but I am happy to see your beautiful smile again.” 

Thea had to admit it felt good to be happy again. She spent so much time being angry, scared, or depressed. She knew she wasn’t fully herself yet. She didn’t know if she would ever be. There were thoughts she still had that bothered her greatly, but she was determined to reach a state of okay again. 

Thea leaned into Laurel as the movie started. They were watching Legally Blonde, which Thea thought was really dorky of Laurel, but also cute. She tilted her head up and watched her watching the movie. The time she had spent with Laurel had been rough, but amazing. She was forever grateful for Laurel. She had been so patient and helpful. 

She felt more attached to the older woman than she had in her life. It was a strange feeling. Laurel had been in her life for a very long time and she wondered if it was wrong to feel this way. She was sweet, beautiful, smart, funny, and so wonderful. She’d taken more time than anyone to make sure that she was okay and make sure she was happy and healthy. Thea kept these thoughts to herself and forced her gaze back to the television. She didn’t think there was ever an appropriate time to bring up possible feelings like this.

* * *

Thea sparred on the mat with Diggle. She was working on training so that she could join him and Laurel at night. There had been a spike in crime and with Thea being in a better headspace she thought she could be useful. She had at least been helpful when they were taking down League members a few months ago. She hadn’t been back since then, though. She had training from Malcolm, but she wanted to learn from the rest of the team as well.

“Guess who got their motorcycle license.” A bright cheery voice filled the room. 

Thea turned with a wide smile to see Laurel holding the brand new laminated license. In doing so she left herself open and received a painful smack to the shins from Dig. 

“Fuck.” She whined and rubbed her legs. 

“Sorry, kid.” 

“You shouldn’t have left yourself open like that,” Laurel teased. “But you didn’t have to hit so hard.” She narrowed her eyes at John. 

“You don’t have to go easy on me, it’s okay.” She smiled as she straightened up. “But you should take me for a ride on your bike.” 

“Maybe.” Laurel’s beautiful grin made Thea’s heart flutter in her chest. 

Yes, this crush or whatever it was had not gone away. It was starting to worry her. She hadn’t said anything about it, but she was afraid to. What if she was just latching onto Laurel because of the kindness she had been given? What if these feelings were real, but Laurel didn’t feel the same way? 

“Wanna spar?” She asked not wanting to think about anything anymore. 

“Sure.” 

“And I’ll get some dinner.” Diggle said wiping some sweat from his face. “Big Belly Burger?” 

They both nodded. 

When Dig was gone Thea and Laurel moved into the middle of the mat. Immediately they began some hand to hand combat. Laurel was fast, but so was Thea. They were both good at dodging each other’s attacks, but things got heated and a little rough. 

Thea moved quickly and swung her legs under Laurel’s knocking her to the ground. Her training with Merlyn rearing its ugly head. She pinned Laurel down or at least she thought she had. Laurel flipped them over so that she was on top. 

There was a pause between them. Both of them were sweaty and panting. Thea looked up into Laurel’s eyes, but her gaze dragged down to her perfect lips. Without really thinking she leaned up and pressed her lips to Laurel’s. She fully expected for her to pull back, but she didn’t. Laurel leaned in more. Her hand found Thea’s and interlaced their fingers. 

This kiss was like nothing Thea had ever felt before. It made her heart pound fast and her stomach do flip flops. When they parted she could hardly believe that had just happened. 

“Wow.” She whispered. “You taste like strawberries.” 

Laurel snorted. “I’m going to take that as a compliment.” 

“It is.” Thea smiled up at her. 

* * *

The rest of the night went the way it usually did. They had dinner, Laurel and Dig went out into the city, and Thea sat behind the computer following directions from Felicity. She had no idea where Felicity even was, but the woman was good at what she did.

It was past midnight before Thea and Laurel were walking up the steps towards their apartment. They hadn’t talked about the kiss, but she didn’t know how to bring that up. She really liked Laurel. Okay she more than liked her and it was going to drive her crazy. 

“Laurel, I think I’m in love with you.” She blurted out when they reached their door. 

“You think?” She turned towards her key still in hand. 

“No.” Thea’s voice dropped to barely a whisper. “I love you.”

Thea was sure her heart was pounding so hard in her chest that it was visible like one of those cartoon wolves. 

Instead of answering her with words Laurel leaned in and kissed her again. When she pulled back she let her breath fan across Thea’s lips, “I love you too, Thea Queen.” She whispered. 

“Thank god.” She giggled.


End file.
